Tuesday, April 3, 2012

stop and smell the aftershave

...or, a short list of things that are recommend to stay happy with your husband*.

1) change. really. i always want him to change. change his mind, change his attitude-- so that i'm right. but i'm usually wrong. and so adamant about it that i don't even realize that not only am i wrong, i'm rude about it. but i still expect him to be the one to change? that's an issue.

2) date him. when we were first dating, and i knew i was going to marry him, things were so great. life was cheerful, we were so kind to one another, we put the other's feelings before our own. then we got married. and selfish. so date! it's an easy way to be kind to each other.

3) be nice to him. when you do little things for him with a servant's heart, you have a harder time being upset with him. even if it's just making his lunch, i know he recognizes that i did that for him.

4) think about what you want to say and why you want to say it. then, more often than not, don't say anything. same rule applies when writing something down (i.e. email, text).

5) enjoy him. simply. enjoy the man he is, the man he's becoming, and the way he treats you. enjoy his heart and his hands and his gusto. enjoy him.

* i wrote this to us. not to you. and this doesn't mean we're having problems. only that being married means remembering things like this and making them habits, as hard as it seems. it's hard to be humble and it's not natural to put someone before yourself. so we work on it.